3 Reasons Why Pride and Prejudice is Overrated

“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.”

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Title: Pride and Prejudice
Author: Jane Austen
Genre: Classics, Fiction, Romance
Setting: Georgian era, Hertfordshire and Derbyshire, England
Pages: 279

Waterstones Summary: “When Elizabeth Bennet first meets eligible bachelor Fitzwilliam Darcy, she thinks him arrogant and conceited; he is indifferent to her good looks and lively mind. When she later discovers that Darcy has involved himself in the troubled relationship between his friend Bingley and her beloved sister Jane, she is determined to dislike him more than ever. In the sparkling comedy of manners that follows, Jane Austen shows the folly of judging by first impressions and superbly evokes the friendships, gossip and snobberies of provincial middle-class life.”

Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice has consistently featured in many lists as one of the greatest novels of all-time and is widely considered to be Austen’s best novel. Beloved in literary circles and by readers alike, its heroine, Elizabeth Bennet, is hailed as one of the best female characters in literature (my own list differs) and the prideful hero, Mr Darcy, is no short of admirers himself.

The romantic pairing of Elizabeth Bennet and Mr Darcy has led to the creation of many modern retellings such as the highly popular ‘Bridget Jones’s Diary’, ‘Ayesha At Last’ and ‘Sofia Khan is Not Obliged’ – though the latter is more loosely based on ‘Bridget Jones’s Diary’.

I first read Pride and Prejudice when I was 21. Though it had been frequently recommended to me for its magical and iconic romance, I couldn’t see myself swooning over Mr Darcy. I ventured into Pride and Prejudice with little to no expectations, and found myself terribly puzzled. Though I had read other classics before including Jane Austen’s ‘Emma’, I struggled to decipher what was being said or even happening. Thoroughly disappointed and confused, I gave it two stars. Language barriers and accessibility aside, Elizabeth and Darcy’s so-called ‘romance’ genuinely baffled me, and I still felt a lingering irritation with Mr Darcy.

The 2005 film adaptation of Pride and Prejudice, starring Keira Knightley and Matthew Macfayden, proved to be much more enjoyable than its book counterpart. It was one of those rare moments where the film outshines the book. Years later, reading positively glowing book reviews on Pride and Prejudice and with an altered expectation after watching the film adaptation, I decided to give Pride and Prejudice another go.

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The first half of Pride and Prejudice, focusing on the social niceties of the Georgian era, is amusingly riveting, and has spurred me to at least watch one Downton Abbey episode (one day, that is). But the more it focused on the ‘romance’ between Mr Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet, the more it began its tumbling downhill descent. Finally finishing, I gave it an additional star, amounting to a three-star ranking, mostly due to the glorious first half.

To end this long intro (finally!), here are the three reasons why Pride and Prejudice is overrated:

1. Elizabeth Bennet is Perfectly Boring

Not to be confused with Keira Knightley’s delightful performance as Elizabeth Bennet where she greatly enhanced the second Miss Bennet’s character with the welcome addition of Elizabeth being a bookworm (she isn’t in the books!).

There is no denying that Elizabeth Bennet is revolutionary for her times – she turns down two marriage proposals in an era where being married was considered an accomplishment (though this expectation still persists to this day) and she turns up at Netherfield Park with a muddied dress and … and … yeah. Otherwise, Elizabeth isn’t particularly interesting, and the narrative falls head over heels over how lively and easy-going Elizabeth is, in fact, it sort of hammers it into our heads with it. Call it reeling from the effects of reverse psychology, but Elizabeth is elevated into such a high and mighty status that it’s almost as if she has no flaws other than her prejudice towards Mr Darcy which could only be a natural consequence of their first meeting. Her lack of flaws make her a lacklustre character. Where other Austen heroines such as Emma Woodhouse and Catherine Morland have both strengths and flaws making them interesting, well-rounded and well-developed characters, Elizabeth seems to exist on 99% strength and 1% reasonable prejudice.  It doesn’t help that the remote storytelling ensures that we aren’t privy to Elizabeth’s thoughts and feelings. 

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Elizabeth Bennet, after accepting Mr Darcy’s second proposal, launches on a reverse pick-me rebuke of Caroline Bingley. What is a ‘pick-me?’ A pick-me is a woman who begs for acceptance of the opposite sex by vilifying their own sex for going against the traditional gender confinements and expectations. In essence, Caroline Bingley *does* beg for acceptance from Mr Darcy, but Elizabeth Bennet’s indirect tirade of shade towards Caroline Bingley and how she, herself, is “different” because she didn’t strive for Mr Darcy’s acceptance is somewhat of a pat on the back for her “I’m not like other girls” self … which isn’t really any better than being a pick-me, but more or less a not-so-distant variation.

2. The Mythical Love Story of Mr Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet

So, I guess Elizabeth Bennet and Mr Darcy sparked the over-used enemies to lovers trope whilst neglecting to add the barest trace of chemistry. To rehash the love story of Mr Darcy and Elizabeth in the simplest of terms from Elizabeth’s POV:

  • Hot, rich and single Mr Darcy at a party refuses to dance with single, plain but lively-eyed Elizabeth Bennet.
  • “You mortified my pride! I hate you!”
  • “We meet again, and I’m beginning to hate you more!”
  • “Oh, wait… Pemberley though… damn.”
  • “Oh, okay, reports of a flourishing review of Mr Darcy’s character…”
  • *Still barely talking to each other*
  • “Ah, you saved my sister from total shame. For me. Okay, that must mean that I love you now. Also, Pemberley. So… marriage it is then.”

… How?! How can two characters who barely talk to each other find themselves in love with each other? How are readers supposed to gauge chemistry from almost non-existent conversation? Let nobody who enjoyed Pride and Prejudice ever criticise arranged marriages ever again because, let me tell you, our first-generation parents spoke more to each other before getting married than Elizabeth and Mr Darcy spoke to each other over the course of many months. This lack of conversation does not go unmissed by Elizabeth Bennet herself as she grows frustrated towards Mr Darcy by the end of Pride and Prejudice for this very reason. Its saving grace is that Elizabeth and Mr Darcy decide together, after Elizabeth accepts Mr Darcy’s marriage proposal, that they’ll spend some time getting to know each other before tying the knot. Well… there’s nothing like an engagement to prompt you to get to know your fiance. I- I am bamboozled.

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Seriously, there is more palpable chemistry between our all-time favourite toxic couple – Heathcliff and Catherine. Even Fanny Price had more chemistry with nature than Elizabeth had with Mr Darcy. Which leads me to…

3. Jane Bennet and Charles Bingley Should Have Been the Main Love Story

Jane Bennet and Charles Bingley have clearly visible chemistry from the very start and make a whole bucket-load of sense. Their love story is far more appealing, and both Jane and Charles as individual characters are refreshingly sweet. I found myself more drawn towards Jane and Charles as a pair, nervously waiting to find out more, and anxious for Jane herself as she increasingly becomes reclusive and withdrawn. This pairing is far truer to life as there are quite a few Jane and Charles to be found in reality. Not only do Charles Bingley and Jane Bennet have clear chemistry, their romantic arc far outshines Elizabeth’s and Darcy’s whereas Elizabeth and Mr Darcy’s love story is bred on the idea of each other much more so than on any visible chemistry.

On a more positive note, I found Mr Darcy to be strangely endearing during this reread and, somehow, felt oddly protective over him.

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What are your thoughts on Pride and Prejudice? Are you a fan of Elizabeth Bennet and Mr Darcy as a couple? What is your unpopular Jane Austen opinion? Who is your favourite Jane Austen heroine? Let me know in the comments!

Sophia Ismaa

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41 Comments

      1. Haha yes agreed. There are some books and tales that we are all so familiar with, even if by TV or cinema, that we don’t see them through the narrow lens they were first written in.
        Or sometimes the ‘myth’ surrounds a character so much that we look at them in a biased manner. For instance, Miss Faversham in Gt Exp always seems to bring to mind an elderly women but Dickens says she was barely 40 haha

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        1. I always thought she was 40+, so when I found that out, I was absolutely shocked. Clearly, our brains are hardwired to think of her as an “old maid.” I could have sworn that I’ve watched films where she’s been aged up as well!

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Yes! I’m sure of that too, I wonder why? One day, I shall have to re-read it just to see if she has any attitudes that people might have chose to belittle by dismissing them as the thoughts of some “mad old lady”.

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            1. Oo, er, I guess we have our own unconscious bias to work on then! Or perhaps given that old maiden applies to unmarried women past the age of 24 (during those eras) perhaps we’re latching on to that? 🧐

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  1. I completely agree with your points!

    I read Pride and Prejudice a few months ago as a challenge to see if I would enjoy the timeless classic.

    Yes, it was an interesting (but difficult) read but I felt like the story was, as you mentioned it, overrated.

    I found Elizabeth boring only because she spends most of the book only fretting about her other sisters’ problems and hating Mr Darcy, not that I would blame her he was a jerk to begin with.

    I felt like the story was an older version of the teen fiction books that my friends and I occasionally read where it’s like ‘Good girl fell in love with the bad boy,
    He hated everyone
    She loved everyone
    He was popular
    She was invisible
    But what happenes when the good girl has to dance with the bad boy?
    Will it be a match made in heaven or a disaster?’

    And that’s how you sum up Pride and Prejudice if it was a modern Teen-fic book.

    I think for your second point, the only counter argument could be that she did have a certain attraction to Mr Darcy but she only ever acknowledged it when she saw that he had a heart (which if you think about it, it’s fair enough)

    I did read that it was Austen’s aim to write a novel where marriage was not a some what reward for her main characters… but if I’m being honest that’s what it ended up being.

    I apologise for the huge comment but… yeah I got nothing, I just like nerding out 😂

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    1. First, it’s so great to see you challenging yourself by reading books you don’t ordinarily read, I think for me that helped in realising what genres I enjoy reading, so I don’t actually miss out on books that I would have otherwise enjoyed had I not been biased!

      Yes, she’s definitely right to be prejudiced towards him at first, I don’t know why she was made to be felt bad on this, who’s going to like someone who’s calling you tolerable like you’re an edible plant on a stranded island! 🤣 You’re right that she wasn’t given much to do, we don’t get to see her character as much which is frustrating. I just have to wonder if people like her because we’ve been told to like her, would they still enjoy her character if they didn’t know anything at all about her character? It’s not that she’s a terrible character, she’s just not very well-developed compared to other Austen heroines like Emma, Catherine, Marianne and Elinor.

      Yep, I think Pride and Prejudice probably kickstarted they whole haters to lovers, good girl bad boy trope, it just wasn’t done well! I can enjoy it when its done well like in A Walk to Remember or Jesper and Wylan in Six of Crows.

      It is mentioned that Mr Darcy was actually the most good looking man in that whole room, so it would be a physical attraction that every woman felt really.

      LOOOOOL. If you don’t give a crap about marriage, marriage will find you. Don’t look for love, love will find you.

      Don’t apologise, it’s so nice to nerd out together, that’s why we review books! 😂😂😂😂

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      1. Yes!!!
        Ah, marriage, that one thing that every Middle Eastern, African or Asian kid can look forward to at one point in their life *note the sarcasm*

        I bet my Grandma will get so sick of us her grandkids not getting married she’ll turn to me and my sister and just decide when we’re getting married.

        Mr Darcy was… your typical bad boy kinda guy. Personally, I didn’t really think Darcy and Liz suited eachother that much and there story was like reading a teen fiction book but with old language but you know, ‘It’s a timeless classic! Respect the classics!’ Kinda thing… lol

        I feel like, when I first read the book, she was this strong female character but as I continued to read she became an obssesive teenage girl and fell in love with Mr Darcy (aka the bad boy) and she went all mushy and apologetic which made her less of a strong female character.

        I don’t know, it was a good book to read but it could have been a lot stronger and Elizabeth could have used a backbone here and there.

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        1. Hey, never rule it out, love can be pretty amazing! 😊 the pressure though? No… I can’t believe you’re getting pressured so young. My sister is already planning because she loves kids.

          Would your parents pick an arranged marriage for you or would they be open to you pursuing a love marriage? My family are so tired, I think, at this point, they’ll probably be fine with me marrying someone who’s non-Muslim as long I can get out the house finally. Jokes on them cos they’ll miss me a lot. 😌

          I don’t even think he was that much of a bad guy. He was a little snooty, but otherwise pretty sweet. I can understand why he might have thought Jane was not in love with Charles because she is pretty reserved! A lot of these retellings of haters to lovers have romantic pairs that barely have any chemistry, it feels so forced. I want one where it ends as “oh, hang on, I think we might be better off as friends.”

          I don’t mind her not being strong, I think she came across as pretty strong. I wish she was more flawed. She just felt caricaturish. Love tends to make you mushy. 😖

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          1. My parents had a love marriage and so did my grandparents so although it is common in arab culture to have arranged marriages a love marriage is not a problem as long as it is halal.

            I like the idea of love and I’m certainly not dismissing it but to my 14 year old brain I can’t seem to fathom how it could possibly meet someone and eventually fall in love with them. Like, how does it work? My brain just doesn’t understand it.

            I don’t know, I always felt cold towards Mr Darcy, sure I did want him and Elizabeth to be together but I felt like he had a long journey of learning how to be more welcoming before he got into my list of top ten fictional ‘Bad boys’. lol

            I think the coolest kind of love is the one in which you get to have fun with your partner but also you have serious moments. That’s the coolest kind of love and it also goes hand in hand with mutual respect.

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            1. That’s beautiful! That sounds really sweet. Quite a few of the older generation in my family have been married more than once lol. One of my uncles has 16 kids. 🙃 I don’t know whether I want love or arranged, all I know is that once should hopefully be enough. And completely agree, whatever you decide to do, Insha’Allah, it’s most important to keep it halal. No man can love you more than Allah (SWT), not even our mothers can love us more.

              Oh, don’t worry. When and if you fall in love, you still won’t understand how it works or how it happened. You may remain ignorant for the rest of your love about how love works and happens. 😭

              I think the book ended with Elizabeth and Darcy deciding to learn more about each other before they got married. Masha’Allah, you cannot deny that they’re doing it the halal way. I hope sister Elizabeth does not forget to bring a mahram with her.

              Basically, should be your best friend! But, omg, yes, mutual trust and respect must be there & that’s a question that we should ask ourselves by the fifth meeting or so. If there’s anything I’ve learned, it’s that someone might pray five times a day or preach Islamic teachings but that doesn’t mean they have good character. I’ve seen a few men do this, but they’ll shout, get annoyed and curse at drivers or retail workers & you’ll be wondering what on Earth they were preaching about. Subhana’Allah, I have great examples of pious men in my family, so I know there are good men like them out there and what I want too in a man.

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              1. Inshallah someday we’ll all find our partners in crime who we’ll marry 😂

                What you said about Elizabeth and Darcy cracked me up 😂 that’s so true but hilarious!

                In my opinion, manners come first and the simple teachings of the religion come first before the praying the sunnah prayers and fasting Mondays and Thursdays etc.

                Mashallah, 16 kids! And I thought my family Dad’s family was big 😂

                In my family all of my Uncles except my Dad and one of my Uncles have been married and divorced at least once.
                So my Mum and my Uncle’s wife always joke around saying that the reason they’re still around is because they’re the second wives.

                My cousins and I were so confused that day we kept interrogating our parents until they explained it was just a joke.

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                1. Insha’Allah, I hope that day comes! 😭

                  LOOL, if you think about it, the Austen era kept it pretty halal. 🙂

                  There’s a saying as well, I can’t remember which source it was, which stressed that manners should come first. In Islamic Law, our professor mentioned something about horizontal and vertical… I don’t know how to explain it, but you can pray, you can fast, but if you don’t have the manners, compassion and empathy, what was it for? I mean, the first thing we think of when we’re reminded of how our Prophet (SAWS) was that is that he was a kind man. Humble, good, compassionate, peaceful. Not just for men, but we should be like that too (it’s harder than it sounds for me). And, one other thing, men need to learn and understand what it means when we say no – this is still referring to the first example.

                  I can’t believe I only found out that he has 16 kids a year or few years ago, I was shocked! But then I found out he was married twice, so that makes sense. But still! Half that and that’s 8 kid for each family! 😩

                  OMG, I feel like it’s much more common than we think to get divorced in our parents generation, but yet, why do we still shame people who’s parents are getting divorced when someone is looking to get married! Some people reject grooms and brides because their parents are divorced, what’s that got to do with them! How does it affect you? 😂 I don’t know if that’s the case with the Arab community as well?

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                  1. Ah the Arab community is one messed up community.

                    We’re very weird but gossip and secrets spread like wildfire. I think for more modernised Arabs there’s isn’t much of an issue when it comes to marriage, interracial marriage, divorcees etc but it’s prefered to have someone who’s never been married and is from the same country.

                    But we all know that never happens because my cousins went and got married to none Arabs which made me hope that I wouldn’t be the disappointment after all 😂

                    Mashallah, 8 kids, I have respect to ur uncle’s wives. I’m sat there struggling to move on my period so I can only imagine what giving birth must be like and to give birth 8 times… I don’t think I could handle it 😂

                    My Mum’s side of the family were always raised to be well mannered and kind and honest. My Mum would always tell me to perfect my manners, then my Salah then my fasts and then start wearing a hijab if I wanted to.

                    So that’s what I did 😃

                    It’s not just that it’s also the we have to remember the Prophet PBUH was a kind and honest and trustworthy person even before he was a prophet and had to be this way so as humans we should be this way without the Quran or our parents telling us to.

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                    1. I had quite a few Arabs in my year at uni, and they mostly stuck together (but I think that’s just natural for most cultures lol). I remember there was this Arab guy who was TAILING me like I’ve never been chased before in the most weird ways & I was thinking “what do I do?!!!!” And then there was this other Arab guy who was once staring at me, and his friend, she’s arab, she was glaring at me because of that. She almost grabbed him away from me like I was even approaching him in the first place lol. I was frustrated because I thought me and her were alright, why is she pissed at me for HIM staring at me. I was just minding my own business. 😭 but I definitely see that arab women have a preference for Arab men, but Arab men are a little more open to other cultures.

                      Oh, that’s interesting! Who did your cousin marry then? Are your parents more open? My family is more open, but I’ll say that we tend to usually only go for the two b’s – Bangladeshi or black.

                      Come to think of it, it was a little disrespectful to his wife. 8 kids. She must be tired of everything. Ooh. I know how you feel about struggling to move on my period, but it turned out that I have endometriosis. If you can, you should check it out if it is severely impacting your ability to move. I found, in my case, when I’m severely stressed, that’s when I’m in a lot of pain. But, Alhumdulillah, last few months have been wonderful, Insha’Allah it stays the same.

                      Ah, your mum sounds wonderful, Masha’Allah. She understands her priorities.

                      I don’t know if you know this story, correct me if you do, there’s a story of our Prophet (SAWS) where he made a facial expression that expressed resentment (I think) to a blind man. And a verse came down, I believe (I may not know this perfectly), that our Prophet shouldn’t make a facial expression like that. That’s how thoughtful we have to be. It is hard though, I have a lot to improve. But Subhana’Allah, our religion is very considerate of how we treat others even when they can’t see us.

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                    2. Yeah! The surah Abasa in Juz 30 is about that story and how the prophet PBUH frowned at the blind man who was just seeking the knowledge about Islam. (Being an Arab kid I am not allowed to learn a surah without knowing the meaning of it… it can be a blessing and a curse 😂)

                      Arab guys… they’re weird 😂.
                      Some of them are decent but take it from someone who has a tone of them as cousins they are SO annoying! 😂

                      The thing is while most Pakistani or Indian families in the UK are at least on their third generation or second generation by now Arabs are relatively new so most of us are either first or second generation.

                      For that reason, some Arab parents can still have the, ‘Only marry Arabs’ mentality and sadly it’s more pressured upon girls than guys, but it does come from a good place even if they’re approaching it wrong. They believe that if their daughters were ever in trouble and needed help from her Husband they would know how to deal with him, being an arab and all while if they were of another nationality the believe they wouldn’t know how to handle it. (I know a bit weird but what can you do…)

                      My cousin ended up marrying a Turkish man who only speaks Turkish which I found hilarious because when my Dad went to the wedding as my cousin’s Wali because her Dad couldn’t be there (He wasn’t able to get out of Syria) My Dad went to greet the groom and knowing he didn’t speak Arabic he spoke to him in English only to discover after having a good 10 minutes of a conversation with him that he does not know a word of English and he was just being polite and pretending to understand my Dad.

                      My Mum and I spent a good 15 minutes laughing at that situation 😂

                      My Dad’s one policy, “He has to be a good Muslim Man who respects his parents and is a Good Muslim,”
                      Although my parents would prefer someone Arab they wouldn’t turn away or disapprove of anyone who isn’t.

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                    3. OMG, your memory is so good! When I was learning Tafseer, I was struggling to remember the source, but I understood and could remember some of the stories… just no idea which Surah it’s from! I have translation books at home, but it’s not the same as learning in class because you miss out on the context.

                      They’re definitely very upfront in the physical sense, but they don’t verbalise attraction, they’re more along the lines of I’m going to be as close to you as possible, do weird things, and hope you get the message lol. I’m bengali, we’re very upfront people. Bengali men are very direct, but I don’t know, need to slightly calm down, they fall in love very quickly.

                      That’s interesting. I wonder if war and conflict has to do with Arab immigration mainly. I think for south Asian communities, for us, it was more so to be able to access better opportunities, but because of this, our relatives back home think we’re loaded, but some of them are living in mansions ten times the size of our houses here. 😂

                      Hmm, I understand where they’re coming from though. I think coming from the same culture, you’ll share the same language, customs, traditions and values and, with family being so important, being able to speak the language helps families get along better.

                      Looooool! He did not stop him at one single point to say he doesn’t know English?!?! 😂😂😂 All that time you’re dad wasted Paha. 😭😭 Your parents seem so wonderful, Subhana’Allah. ☺️

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                    4. I still laugh about it until this day 😆 I do love my Dad but I completely understood after that situation who I get the ‘Stupid situations’ gene from 😂

                      Alhamdullah my parents are amazing I’m not going to deny it and I would never want anyone else to replace them because that would be impossible.

                      Arab immigrants struggle a lot because most of them would be refugees not immigrants to be honest. The raw truth about it is they don’t feel like they belong sometimes but cannot return because of 2 things:
                      1) The reason they fled the country hasn’t been dealt with.
                      2) They’re afraid of backlash- many refugees are afraid of returning to their home countries to be met with criticism on how they were weak and ran away in a time when they needed to stand up and be strong. But the reality is it’s not as easy as it sounds.

                      And definitely the idea that life in the Western countries is easier is very popular amongst the Arab population so many people get a huge shock when they come here and realise that the Western life is in some cases worse than the life back home and it’s a lot more expensive.

                      I have no clue how Arab men operate when it comes to love simply because the only men I am surrounded by are my Dad, grandad and uncles. All of which- or most of which are married or have been married. So I’m clueless in that department 😂 but they’re a lot less physical I would say to be honest and generally you don’t even realise that they’re attracted to that person until they express it by asking for the Wali’s number or something 😂
                      (I’m basing this all off of my cousins’ marriages so I can’t vouch that’s what all Arab men do but that’s what my family does)

                      My memory has not got much to do with me remember the Ayas of the Quran it’s more of hours of Arabic school exams and tests on remembering every single word and it’s meaning that leaves me remembering everything because you simply do not forget those hours of exhausting revision 😂
                      It also helped that I grew up listening to the stories of the Quran so it sticks when I read the surah I guess.

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                    5. LOOOOL what your dad did was basically a whole comedy sketch. Omg, I’m following these meme pages and you guys have some amazing meme videos and go all out. There was one where three Arab uncles did a biryani reveal and it was so melodramatic. 😭😭😭😭 I swear, imagine if the Arab and south Asian community got together to make comedy sketches, we would make the most dramatic videos of all time.

                      Subhana’Allah. That’s so good. May Allah (SWT) reward them immensely.

                      That’s a terrifying thought, the second part especially, to have to deal with the guilt of leaving, but there’s knowing when you have the power to change something and being able to ensure the safety of your family. They could have only done what’s best for their family and, Insha’Allah, there will be reward in doing that. Your safety comes first.

                      Yep, and I think much of that is attributed to how the west has depicted itself in global media as a land of dreams and realising opportunities, much of it which is propaganda. I’ve met North African women who’ve spoken about leaving their countries because they thought that the west would give them better rights as women, only to find that their race, religion and gender have come in conflict with false expectations. It’s very misleading. In short, it’s a whole con.

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                    6. I would pay to watch those comedy sketches. 😂

                      Inshallah some day- all of these troubles will end and the viscous cycle of the rich getting richer and the poor staying poor will finally end, inshallah.

                      But yes- I completely agree- the western world is portrayed as a some sort of dream reality when really its just another country that- yes- could possibly provide you with better opportunities- but not as exaggerated as it is made when we hear about it.

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                    7. Oh, oops, wait, didn’t reply to the rest! I would have much preferred it if they asked for my wali’s number instead of these staring competitions without even talking to me and invasions of my personal space. What is this game! I don’t know! Let’s see. Maybe by the time you’ve reached your 20’s, hopefully it’ll be a lot different. I had one bengali guy who asked me for my wali’s number and, I was like what?!!?! I’m at my job right now. Stop! You know what. No. I think most men are just incomprehensible.

                      I grew up listening to stories from the Hadith, but the only thing I essentially remembered was that the Prophet (SAWS) was so kind! That’s it! You’ll need to pass on your revision techniques. But I agree with you that constantly going over the surah’s helps much more. My sarf teacher did this, we practised till we were exhausted, but it stuck because we drilled it into our head. I think it’s so much better when lessons are taught like this, especially when it comes to Islam because we want it to stick after all! So, your teachers definitely did amazing, Subhana’Allah, May Allah (SWT) reward them.

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                    8. 😂 My Dad and I were just discussing marriage a few seconds ago and I turned to my Dad and I was like- Dad you don’t have to worry about me- I’m never leaving and he just grinned and said- that makes my life so much easier.

                      I couldn’t stop laughing 😆 😂

                      To be honest- marriage has always been a somewhat crazy topic when it comes to the Arab community because it really does vary from one family to the next- some families will only accept people of the same nationality (Ik it’s an incorrect way of thinking…)
                      Some are okay with any as long as they speak the same language.
                      Some Faith is what truly matter.
                      Etc- We really cannot agree on one opinion. (Sorry I went off topic)

                      I’m sure when I reach my 20s I’ll have a whole new aspect to marriage etc- but from the perspective of my soon to be 19 year old ‘big sister’- she gets a lot of pressure from her extended Family to be married despite her lack of interest in it- it’s actually hilarious the conversation that go on between her and her uncles and aunts. 😂

                      If there’s one thing Arabs mastered it’s how to get a piece of information drilled into your mind so you, never, ever forget it- so it would be shocking if I were to forget these sorts of things to be honest 😂

                      But of course- the method doesn’t work with everyone but it certainly did for me. 😂

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                    9. Awwww! Bless him. He most likely wants to keep you around forever. He will miss you so much if you leave.

                      It’s very much the same in the south Asian community. Pakistanis tend to keep to their own, same with my fellow bengalis, and Indian people I think, from what I’ve seen, are more willing to marry outside their culture. I understand though, I don’t think much of it is out of hatred, it’s just more convenient and I guess easier. But I’ve seen Turkish Arabs are more open too.

                      She’s only 19! Let the poor girl live! If love comes her way, so be it. But she’s very young and, I’m guessing, studying as well. I hope she isn’t pressured too much into getting married too young too soon.

                      I’m definitely going to try your technique from now on when it comes to revising. I remember doing it for law in college and it worked really well. I think if it’s rote memorisation tests, it works. Especially if you’re learning languages.

                      Liked by 1 person

                    10. Fathers- always want to keep us around forever.

                      My ‘Big sister’ is fine- she takes it as a joke and it helps that she doesn’t see that side of the family often as they live in a different country so she doesn’t have to worry about being pressured to get married. 😂

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  2. “Oh wait… Pemberley though…”

    See I saw the 94 miniseries and the Knightley movie before reading the book and that’s always what I thought! Elizabeth was like jeez, well I don’t like him but life is tough and we never have to see each other in a house that size 😉

    Pride and Prejudice is entertaining but it’s my least favorite Jane Austen book so I totally agree with your points!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. LOOOOL! Elizabeth had chemistry with Pemberley, that’s it. That’s the only way it makes sense. If her sights are purely set on Pemberley, that would have made her a more interesting character.

      I think we’re one of the few who enjoy it the least, but, hey, at least now there’s three of us who didn’t enjoy it that much.

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    1. I need to reread Persuasion, I think I’m gonna see the book in a whole NEW light, especially Anne… and tell her to be honest about her feelings because if she was the book would have finished at the halfway mark! 😂 But, no, I get it, telling someone you love them is HARD.

      The film was so much better, both of them care across so much more likeable. I felt pretty protective of Darcy this time, he was slightly rude at first, but, otherwise, he was alright, just a normal shy introvert!

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  3. If you put yourself in the frame of mind of a young woman living in that time period…as Austin was… Only then do you see the appeal of the characters and the story. You cannot compare her viewpoints to the writers of modern teen fiction or any other modern genre (of which a great many are admittedly based on her story lines as you wrote.) There are great flaws in all of her characters, including E. Bennett, which she was trying to express. She was not the typical mild mannered good girl of the time, and went against expectations. In some ways Austin admired her character and in other ways, by writing of Elizabeth’s somewhat unwarranted prejudice, shows that she did not like aspects of Elizabeth’s character. To dismiss her novel as being irrelevant is to ignore the impact it has had on the entire following 200 years of literature and entertainment. Where will the words of this blog and it’s comments be in 200 years?

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    1. I appreciate that Elizabeth Bennet is revolutionary for her times. However, you’ve entirely mistaken the tone of my article and failed to read between the lines that it’s merely light-hearted poking at Pride and Prejudice. If it wasn’t, I would have used a far more serious tone for this post. To summarise, it’s not that deep for me. Elizabeth’s defiance of the norms is similar to the struggles that many South Asian women face in the pressures that we deal with by our culture to get married and that our self-worth is essentially tied to it. Within this intersection it is important, however, as much as I love love, I don’t hold myself to the standards of outdated cultural norms. There are just simply bigger fish to fry for me. I’d much rather reserve my attention to other causes I am passionate about – race discrimination, racism and CSA. In 200 years, I hope the issues that I’ve listed are deemed as far more important and are given much greater attention to instead. With respect to marriage, perhaps our attention should be directed to forced marriages instead.

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